Changes

(Yes, this blog will be about more than the city I live in. It might also be about whatever stumbles into my brain on a bleary midweek day.)

I worked retail for a decade one year, and two of the wares we pedalled were books: The What’s Happening to My Body Book for Boys, and The What’s Happening to My Body Book for Girls. I’ve come to the conclusion of late that there needs to be at least one more entry in the series: The What’s Happening to My Body Book for Old Guys.

The questions would be mostly the same, although the answers might be different:

• What are these parts of my body for, and why are they suddenly getting bigger (love-handles, earlobes, boobs)?
• Why am I suddenly growing hair in places I never had it before (ears, knuckles, between the eyebrows)?
• Why am I suddenly prone to fits of depression/rage/stupidity?
• Why am I suddenly so awkward?
• Will I ever, ever have sex?

You get the picture. Speaking of which, I do envision the book with explanatory diagrams of the midlife reproductive system, if only for comic relief.